atheistblogroll

...so what are we gonna do?

By summerbreeze ~

What an upbeat title, huh? But as an atheist, lately I've been thinking about the fact that I absolutely do not want a Christian funeral, or any funeral, and I'd better get on the stick to see that that doesn't happen.

I'm writing this article to help my fellow free-thinkers with information I've dug up on this subject. It's not too early to think about these things, after all, any one of us could be hit by a bus tomorrow !

I found that the majority of free-thinkers prefer to be cremated, and when you think about it, it makes sense. Putting yourself in the hands of a funeral home, whether you are religious or not, can cause a lot of unwanted things to happen. I have been responsible for the planning of 4 funerals at 4 different funeral homes, and I can tell you that the calm, smiling and seemingly 'concerned' funeral directors ( and sales staff ) have one goal in mind, to extract as much moo-la from your pockets at a very vulnerable time in your life.

It is not necessary to go thru a funeral home in order to be cremated, and believe me, funeral homes jack up the price and also add extra fees.

My state ( Mich. ) has a " Cremation Society of Michigan ", and you become a member ( $40.00 for individuals, and $70.00 for married couples ) and are openly welcome to inspect the crematory yourself at any time. Your loved ones are even allowed to be there for the entire cremation process after you die, if they choose to do so. All costs, including them to come and "fetch" you, are included in the $1,295.00 total. In some states it's even cheaper....and one hell of a lot cheaper than the $7,500.00 national average cost of a traditional funeral. They also partner with Hospice to provide grief assistance to families at no additional cost.

I think that there are 5 to 10 of us here in Mich. that are members of ExChristian.net, so if anyone of you are interested, here's their site: www.cremationmichigan.com

I checked on about 20 states at random, just to see if they also had cremation societies, and every one I tried, did. So if you want to see if your state has one, Google Cremation Society of ___________( your state ). Sometimes a lot of choices were presented, just make sure the one you pick is NOT affiliated with a funeral home ( or else you'll be screwed out of $$$ )

If cremation isn't your cup of tea, there is what is called green burial, or natural burial. Not all states have green cemeteries yet though. There is no embalming, and the person is placed in an eco-friendly "casket" (inexpensive) or wrapped in a shroud type cloth, or a favorite blanket. If this is of interest to you, click on www.naturalburial.coop. This is The Centre for Natural Burial.

I also checked into "backyard burials", and was surprised at the number of states that allowed it. Each state is different, but if you call your state's Department of Health ( or Department of Public Health ) and ask for the "Mortuary Standards Supervisor" ( perhaps that title is a little different in different states ) you can find out the regulations for burial on your property, or your children's property.

Also there is a website that is interesting for backyard burials called "Backyard burial...yes, you can"
the website is www.backyardburial.net. Then click on "Legal"

Ten years ago, our young neighbor died very unexpectedly, and his Dad, who lived in Kentucky on hundreds of acres, buried him there on his property. I always thought that that was pretty cool.

Heck, when wagon trains headed West, they say that there were at least a thousand or more men, women & children who were buried right next to the trail-----no rules and regulations then. Now, in the funeral industry, there's enough rules to choke a horse.

I've given a lot of thought as to what I want to happen after I die. I have to write it all out, make a lot of copies ( extra ones so my kids could send them to uptight fundy relatives if they start to snort that I MUST have a christian burial ! ) and sit down with my Daughters to have a heart to heart about my wishes....and tell them if they don't abide, I'll haunt them for the rest of their days.

I am by-passing the funeral home all together.

No viewing, no embalming, no funeral----just cremation with the ashes to be divided in two, half to be buried right on top of my Mom's grave ( the kids will have to be sneaky about this, but then no one is ever around any way when I visit my folks' graves.)

The other half, is to be scattered in a beautiful valley called Moose Meadow ( goofy name though )by my kids, sons-in-law & grandkids. This is in Banff National Park in the Canadian Rockies, the prettiest and most serene place I've ever seen. I've set aside a fund, just so that it will pay for all of them to fly out there ( with me in a Mason Jar I suppose! ) plus stay on afterwards to enjoy the beauty and solitude of that area.

I'm going to tell the kids that they CAN say prayers and sing religious songs at both places....of course this is entirely for THEIR benefit and comfort...I wouldn't take that away from them.

"Spare me the whispering, crowded room, the friends who come and gape and go, the ceremonious air of gloom....all, which makes death a hideous show"
~Matthew Arnold ( 1822-1888 )English poet and social critic

Now-a-days there are so many alternatives to a traditional funeral. Last week I heard about a free-spirited atheist who had his ashes flung out from a cliff in one of those beautiful Western Parks with the unusual rock formations. All the people who attended rode horses there and as the ashes were flung out, they sang "Happy Trails To You"

----pretty sweet, huh ?

I'm curious if anyone reading this, has thoughts about what their last wishes are, ANYTHING FUNNY OR UNUSUAL ? ?
Please Tell ! !

If your eyes aren't worn out by now, here's a joke, in closing :

+ Finland +

Hannu wants everything to be perfect for his anniversary trip to the hotel where he and his wife honeymooned 30 years earlier. So he gets there a day early to make all the arrangements. That night, he e-mails her but misspells the address and it goes to a recent widow.

The next day, the widow's son finds his mother passed out in front of her computer. On the screen is this e-mail :

"My darling wife, I've just gotten here and everything's set for your arrival tomorrow. I hope your trip down here will be as pleasant as mine."
"P.S. It's really hot!"

Newsnight BBC2 08 September 2010

Have you ever encountered those annoying guys who will knock on your door in a peaceful Saturday morning to convince you to…er… nope I’m not talking about those Electrolux salesmen and Avon ladies. I’m talking about those members of the Christian cult, the Jehovah’s Witnesses. And now, these traveling salesmen of faith are saying to atheists to keep our ideas on ourselves. What? Wait a minute there buddy, who’s the one tapping on windows to give (or sell) those nifty little magazines and pamphlets?

In their new issue “Is Atheism on the March”, it seems the Watchtower Society have much to say about atheism (finally!). Uh…yes that is on the Awake! Magazine. You know…that magazine who said that the Bible has 50,000 errors…I think it is their September 8, 1957 issue. Anyway, let see why atheism is pissing them off. So it seems the JW group are now being affected by the "atheist scare" huh? In the latest Awake! (November 2010)  they featured some stories about their issue against atheism.  

A new group of atheists has arisen in society. Called the new atheists, they are not content to keep their views to themselves. Rather, they are on a crusade, “actively, angrily, passionately trying to persuade the religious to their point of view,” wrote columnist Richard Bernstein. Even agnostics are in their sights, for these new atheists allow no room for doubt. To them, there simply is no God. End of story.

      Ah so that's it. So atheists are in a crusade huh? But they're still not knocking at your doors and doing a sales pitch. Oh I think the author of this article forgot that agnostics can also be atheistic...remember no believe and no knowledge can sleep in the same bed. 

One tool aimed at weakening that hold is the written word, which seems to be stirring up considerable interest, for some of the new atheists’ books have become best sellers.

So why not write a best seller? Oh I get it, you guys can't convince people that it is a sin to salute to the American flag and to accept blood donations huh? Well...blame Red Cross not us atheists.  
Credibility?
For your information, the Jehovah’s Witnesses was founded by Charles Taze Russell and his associates (whoever they are) in 1872.
Before being known as Jehovah’s Witnesses in 1931, Russell’s church was first known as Millennial Dawnism and later as The International Bible Students.
Russell’s doctrines were heavily influenced by G. Jonas Wendel (December 25, 1815 - August 14, 1873) a zealous Adventist who believed that Christ Second Coming will happen in 1874. In Chapter 5 pp. 43-44 of his book Proclaiming the Lord’s Return (1870-1914) Russell said, “The twig, though, had been trained by God-fearing parents; it was inclined "in the direction of the Lord." While he was  searching for truth in 1869, something happened that reestablished Charles’ faith. Walking along near the Russells’ store on Federal Street, he heard religious singing coming from a basement hall. In his own words, this is what took place:
"Seemingly by accident, one evening I dropped into a dusty, dingy hall, where I had heard religious services were held, to see if the handful who met there had anything more sensible to offer than the creeds of the great churches. There, for the first time, I heard something of the views of Second Adventists [Advent Christian Church], the preacher being Mr. Jonas Wendell . . . Thus, I confess indebtedness to Adventists as well as to other denominations.”
Well 1876 came to pass...When nothing happened, Russell claimed that Jesus did return, in invisible form.
It seems Russell has this habit of not keeping his doctrine straight – he keeps changing his claims. He claimed that believers would be ‘called away bodily’ in 1878 but when this didn’t happened he corrected his ‘explanation’, saying what he really meant (?) is that believers that die in the year 1878 and onwards will go straight to Paradise instead of waiting for the Second Coming of Christ un their graves. He also said that you can gain enlightenment just by reading his 6-volume Studies in the Scriptures – Yes! You don’t need to study the Bible. In 1908 to 1916, he sold his ‘Miracle Wheat’ through the pages of his Watchtower Magazine. For your information, this Miracle Wheat is sold 60 times the price of ordinary wheat (at $60 a bushel!). The Brooklyn Eagle exposed this fraud.
In a court case that Russell filed against Reverend J.S. Ross of Hamilton, Ontario, he claimed (under oath) that he understands Greek, but it was proven in court that he didn’t even know the Greek alphabet.
Russell (again) claimed that Christ will return in 1914, and the resurrection of the ‘heavenly organization’ will follow in 1918 (and believing that the “Great Pyramid of Gizeh” was “God’s stone witness” which proved Russell’s claims that “the time of the end”). Again, nothing happened but Russell was a very stubborn man. He again insisted that Jesus did return…invisible to human eyes (Oh for crying out loud!). But he keeps on yapping about the end times that will occur in 1915 and 1916. In fact, Watchtower has a history of proclaiming the end of the world on several dates: 1914, 1915, 1918, 1925, 1940’s, and in 1975.
Russell believed that all 144,000 members of the JW have a place in heaven. This caused a problem when church membership swelled. New York attorney Joseph Rutherford who replaced Russell after his death in 1916 wrote a ‘new’ seventh volume of Studies in the Scripture announcing that once heaven is full, the excess members of the church will re-populate the new Earth.
When Rutherford died in 1942, he was succeeded by Nathan Homer Knorr, who commissioned a new translation of the Bible – the New World Translation which incorporated all the JV doctrines.
So much for credibility.
Going back to the article.
There were three articles in that issue. The first one is an introduction and again, the article is trying to promote the so-called New Atheism (See What’s New With Atheism). It also depicts atheists as people angry with religion and that they (the atheists) are trying to replace religion with science ( While the new atheists reproach religion, they revere science, some even claiming that it disproves the existence of God. )
The next article (A WORLD WITHOUT RELIGION—AN IMPROVEMENT?) deals with the issue of a godless society. Again, the author seems to imply the connection of being morally good and believing in God. There are even pictures of something from Nazi death camps and Pol-Pot’s ‘Killing Fields’ in Cambodia. So, what happened with the Crusades and the Inquisition…are they…Uh OK…I get it. While other Christians were killing non-believers and pagans, Russell was too busy selling his wheat. (at $60.00 per bushel! Good Grief!)
The last article, I WAS RAISED AN ATHEIST was about this two ‘scientists’ who are members of the Jehovah’s Witnesses club…yeah right…and that 2 can erased the 70 percent that doesn’t believe huh?
After reading the whole magazine...well...where's the beef? Where's the refutation against atheism? Oh I know...it is invisible to human eyes...
I thought so.
Read more: From The AWAKE! Magazine: IS ATHEISM ON THE MARCH? by The Atheist Geek

By Vince ~

I'm not really much of a writer, so bear with me.

I was brought up Protestant for most of my life, and a couple of years ago I went through a Catholic conversion. I think I wanted to become Catholic to piss off the Protestants, more than anything...

I was told that God would take care of my depression. I was told God would deal with the people that I had been tormented by, in and out of school. I was told God would take care of the pain of not being able to find a significant other, or land a decent job, or do something worthwhile with my life.

Going back 5 years ago, I was at the tail end of a methamphetamine problem. Prior, I was having major anxiety attacks from having a girl I cared a great deal commit suicide on Oct. 4th, 2004, and I was convinced I killed her. I gave her the drugs, sure, but her crazy boyfriend who frequently drove her into fits was the last person to talk to her.

I started by drug habit in Feb. of 2005. I was sent away in a shit hole called the Set Free Ministry in Cabazon, CA on June 13th, 2005. Yeah, I volunteered to go in because I needed help.

I remember it well. The last week of my addiction I just completely fell apart, I imagine because I ran into a bad batch of meth from a shady dealer I knew.

Anyway, I called my pastor, the one that was working with me after the suicide. I quickly became his right hand man, and we were good friends in the beginning. He was the "read your books and let God do the work. You don't need meds" type. After the drug habit came, he said exactly the same thing.

On June 12th, I called him on the phone and said I need to get away for a week to mellow out, and I needed him to talk to my broker and let him know I needed a week off.

My broker, pastor, and I were pretty tight at the time. I thought, anyway.

I was a total mess. Totally broken down and in tears, and wanted all of this to just stop. They told me about the set free ministry, and that it didn't cost anything. My apartment, owned by my broker, would be packed up and moved to a storage unit. He assured me my car would be started regularly to maintain the battery, and my mail would be checked on. "Don't worry about anything. Anything you need. When you come back, you'll be a HERO!"

60-90 days. Anything I needed. So I went. Anyone who has been to this thing knows the program is crap. I have some stories. Users became leaders after two weeks in the program. Incompetence ruled. I'm not going to go into it now...

After 60 days I was deemed "cured", and I was more than ready to get back in action... another thing my broker assured me of. So I called him to let him know I was ready to get back into action.

"I don't know what you were led to believe, but I fired you the day after you left."

I was part of a major brokerage (think C21 or Keller Williams). They had a program where, if you recruited an agent, you would get 10% of their commissions. HOWEVER, if your agency was terminated, the 10% reverted to the brokerage. The agent was a top producing agent. It would have meant about $6-10,000 of additional income for me. Easily enough to take care of the tax debt I had incurred during my drug habit.

The pastor who advised me to go to rehab had been sleeping with a woman other than his wife, and was in the process of bailing out of a church that was getting into serious trouble. He was done bailing out of the church about 2 weeks before my "cured" date.

The other paster, who's family I had become practically adopted into 7 YEARS prior, was contacted. "Get your head around it. Its GOD working in your life!" No help at all.

My step-mom convinced my dad, rather easily I thought, that I was just a problem that they didn't need around. My sister, formerly a meth manufacturer and dealer turned christian, had the same opinion. So rather than 60-90 days, I was stuck there for 5 months trying to find a way out.

Sadly enough, through all of this I thought "Sure, this is God's will, so I won't be filing any lawsuits on anybody". Stupid.

(This is getting long... so to cut it short)

I finally landed a gig at a protestant camp where I live, but I was still plagued with depression and anxiety attacks. (Yes I tried to get medical help. Another story...). I finally got on meds, but still having symptoms. The camp manager (former alcoholic, piller of his church community) suspened me for 2 weeks because I wouldn't disclose what meds I was taking.

In my anxiety, I resigned immediately and was planning a lawsuit at this time. But, of course, I had a change of heart (I was a converted Catholic at this time) and decided not to sue. It figures that now that the statute of limitations is over for my case, I had to drop any religion I had altogether. Too little too late, I guess.

Religion is a lie. You are convinced that bad things happen for a reason, and God will take care of it somehow. And if not in this life, at least in Heaven it won't matter anymore right? During my depression, and my drug use, and every other critical time I needed help, prayer did nothing. I waited and waited and waited. My life is in shambles. I'm unemployed with no income. Everyone I knew has left. If I knew better I would have started fighting long ago instead of "letting go and letting God". Religion needs to go, period.

Really, I could type this thing for days and get into more detail about all of this. I hope I don't look like some kinda dumbass just because I can't type. Again, sorry I write like crap.

CATHOLIC forums have been buzzing like angry wasps over the news this week that a young Spanish man was slapped by a priest for allegedly desecrating a communion wafer.

Outraged by the act, one religiot calling himself Sternhauser posted this comment on Phatmass.com:

Boy, that priest should have slapped that boy until he acknowledged that he had done wrong. Over and over again. A million slaps, yea, even a million lashes wouldn’t be able to punish the boy for what he did, or force him to acknowledge that what he did was wrong, but that priest sure should have tried. Perhaps he should have even called down fire from heaven upon the young blasphemer’s house. Because that’s how souls are saved.

According to this report, the priest in Spain’s province of Valencia slapped the young man in a church in the town of Rótova during a local festival on the evening of September 5.

Believing that the young man had discarded a communion wafer, which the Catholic faith teaches is truly the body and blood of Jesus Christ under the mere appearance of bread, Rev Victor Jimeno then threw him out of the church while denouncing him as a “blasphemer.”

The victim, however, returned the blow.

According to statements made by the priest, the young man may actually be innocent and is taking the blame for a friend who actually did commit the deed.

The priest spoke to the parents of the young man, who has taken to bed in an apparent fit of pique.

Said Jimeno:

Rótova is a small town, a big family, and we don’t want the news to go further.

And he hoped that the town would not become the butt of jokes.

While he recognized that it was indeed members of his own congregation who committed the outrage, the priest says he wants to promote reconciliation and peace.

A friend of the young man who was assaulted by the priest explained that his friend is very upset and unrepentant. The friend explained that the young man threw the communion wafer to the floor during a fit of choking.

ALBANY, GA – A Coffee County pastor and former Christian school headmaster is in jail charged with child molestation.

Sheriff's investigators say 50-year-old Steven Rowe admitted he abused at least four victims while he led Faith Christian Academy and First Community Church in Douglas.

Car after car filed into the school's parking lot Tuesday night. Parents were called in to meet with school and church leaders about the child molestation charges filed against a man they trusted with their children.

"We've got people with a lot of questions. We've got families out there who are hurting that are involved in this and a church that is involved in this," said current FCA headmaster and interim First Community Church Pastor Ben Warren.

Less than a mile away from the church and school he helped establish nearly a decade ago, Rowe sits in the Coffee County Jail charged with 4 counts of child molestation and 2 counts of aggravated child molestation.

Warren, who took over headmaster duties three weeks ago, says the news of Rowe's arrest has shocked the entire community.

"I'm standing here tonight in a state of shock. I would have never figured this. And if you ask around the community here you'll find that no one ever really thought this," said Warren.

He says Rowe has not been affiliated with the church in more than a year and was teaching in Brunswick at the time of his arrest.

Investigators say the crimes were likely committed sometime between 2005 and 2008 and parents were asked to talk with their kids to find out if there could be more victims who haven't come forward.

STORY LINK

US soldiers 'killed Afghan civilians for sport and collected fingers as trophies' http://bit.ly/arX4mp

@therisinsun - Stunning!

Jefferson Hawkins joined $cientology in 1967. And he defected in 2003. And as you can imagine, that 40 years has given him quite a story to tell. And now he’s telling it in his new book, Counterfeit Dreams. And Hawkins wasn’t just anyone. He was the one who came up with the idea for the Dianetics “volcano” commercial among others, and ironically played a major role in a resurgence of the book’s popularity in the 1980s.

And now, like so many high-ranking $cientologists who actively played a major role in the cult’s PR, he’s coming forward and exposing the deception he himself was a part of. He also says that despite the cult’s insistence that they’ve got millions of followers around the world, the number of active members is probably closer to 50,000.

Let’s help make Counterfeit Dreams more successful than Dianetics ever was.

Parrots are wonderful pets. You will quickly find that these birds extremely smart and their ability to learn make them fun to train. Keep in mind that any animal that shows signs of high intelligence can easily get bored, so your job is to train your pet parrot and spend the time it takes to make your bird into a wonderful pet. It takes time and patience to train a parrot, but with the proper training, your parrot will provide you with many years of friendship.

You can train your parrot when you follow a few steps. Whenever “school is in?for your parrot, it is always best to remove your parrot from his or her cage and train in a small quiet space. Your parrot is more likely to remain attentive and retain information when it is in a new environment. The next thing you will want to do, eliminate all distractions in your home. If your parrot becomes distracted during training, it will not learn well. That means that you need to turn off the radio, television and perhaps even the telephone. Also, remember that parrots are a lot like children. They have short attention spans, so short training sessions are recommended.

In addition, try to plan your parrot’s training time around their schedule, not yours. After mealtime is always, a good time for training because your parrot will be content and will pay attention. Your parrot will also appreciate plenty of praise. Even if you find that you were not very successful, do not let your parrot see your stress levels rise. This makes it an unpleasant experience for your bird and you will have a harder time getting your parrot interested in learning in the future.

When you are ready to teach your parrot a new trick, your pet parrot will respond well to treats and praise. Remember that all animals respond better to praise than punishment. Try to avoid punishing your parrot, even if he or she is acting naughty. Ignoring this behavior is your best bet when training your pet parrot. Parrots do not understand punishment or negative reinforcement. In fact, if you respond to your parrot’s bad behavior, your pet may actually see this as positive attention. Keep in mind that while your parrot will love food treats as rewards, try to accentuate the positive and encourage good behavior with lots of praise and play time. Otherwise, your parrot may only perform the tricks you want them to when some kind of food reward is available.

Repetition is the key to successfully training your pet parrot. Repeating these basic steps repeatedly until your pet “gets?the trick is the best way to train your parrot to perform. This works well for basic commands and advanced tricks. If you have just gotten your pet parrot, start out with very simple tricks, such as teaching your parrot to sit on your finger on command. Find a word for each trick and use it every time you train. Most of all, never force your parrot to train. If you find your parrot is tired or uninterested, then stop and try again another time.

As your parrot learns more command and tricks, you can begin moving your training session closer and closer to the bird’s cage. As they get better at their new skill, they will feel comfortable performing in his or her cage and in the hustle and bustle of your household. Birds learn quickly in most cases, and sometimes just by listening when not in training, which may cause embarrassment to you if they learn something inappropriate.

Training a parrot takes a lot of time and patience. You must love your bird and have a lot of time and dedication to make this partnership worthwhile. With patient training and love, you end up with a fantastic and well-behaved pet that will be with you for a very long time to come.

656

Deep Thoughts: Artists at work – John Chiara http://bit.ly/db78cO

Chapter 111 of tke Koran is about burning a non-Muslim.

The power of Abu Lahab will perish, and he will perish.
Abu Lahab will die and be plunged in flaming Fire. His wife will have on her neck a halter of palm fiber.
His wealth and gains will not exempt him.
He will be plunged in flaming Fire,
And his wife, the wood-carrier,
Will have upon her neck a halter of palm-fibre.
Is it as wrong to burn a person as it is to burn the Koran?

God is no longer male, says Scottish Episcopal church | Mail Online http://bit.ly/apFHLM

Back in December, I reported that the Skepdoc, Harriet Hall, accepted a rather unusual job offer. It seemed that the new health and environment editor at O, Oprah’s magazine, wanted Hall to write a regular column for the magazine. And while I was very excited at the prospect of Hall introducing skepticism to Oprah’s audience, I had doubts, fearing this might inevitably lead to the apocalypse like when Angel took that job at Wolfram & Hart.

But I at least hoped that worst case scenario, I’d get to slay the dragon (Okay, I’ve gotten that pop culture reference out of my system). Sadly, Dr. Hall will no longer be working for Oprah. She explains why in an article at Science-Based Medicine as well as the ridiculous bullshit she had to deal with the entire time.

Related articles by Zemanta

• Bravo, Harriet Hall! (scienceblogs.com)

@T1theinfamous Crazy world.

A few weeks ago our daughter Melissa was born in the hospital in Perugia; within seven hours she had already become the target of religious proselytizing. A friar, whose apparent job it was to prowl the maternity ward lecturing exhausted, newly-minted mothers on the Catechism had snuck into my wife’s room after breakfast. “And have we given some thought to how we’re going to raise these children?” This was his icebreaker.

My wife (I was home napping after almost 40 hours of wakefulness) sent him packing with a pithy yet diplomatic, “We’re not believers.” She tells me that the dyspeptic Man of God began lamenting the presence of atheists, saying he didn’t know what the word even meant. “Everyone believes in something,” were his apocryphal last words before stomping off.

“It’s a good thing I wasn’t around,” I said. “And what would you have done, punched him in the nose?” And here I said something that surprised even me. “I would’ve bought him a coffee and talked things over.” Ah, the noble cadences of new-father speech. “Oh, please. You can’t talk to these people. They’re dogmatic! Just nod politely until they go away.”

My wife was probably right about that. What could I possibly have said to a fanatical friar whose mission in life is to convert defenseless infants? Silly me, always thinking a good attempt at seeing-eye-to-eye is the solution to life’s problems. But I didn’t want to convert him; I just wanted to present him with a novel idea: that what he felt was the most important thing in the world — namely, baptizing children and raising them in the Catholic faith — was to some people merely an annoyance. To others it was downright offensive.

A few days after the incident (we never saw him again) my brother-in-law asked us to be godparents to his three month old son. Here we go again, I thought. “Does your brother even know how these things work? Does he understand that a baptism is — at least for the Church — the most serious thing imaginable? And that they’re not going to let an atheist Jew shepherd one of their subjects without a fight?” I was almost rolling up my sleeves.

I’ve been to baptisms and listened to the recited prayers, and there are things even a godparent must assent to that I would feel uncomfortable with. It’s a profession of faith, and of keeping faith. How odd that so many with baptismal certificates have never actually paid attention to the words being spoken, quite literally, over their heads. Oh, that’s right, they were infants when it happened!

“There’s no way I’m doing this. I’m not making any false affirmations before a congregation,” I said. That is, assuming that an ultra-liberal, schismatic priest would even allow me to lie through my teeth. “Why are we suddenly being trailed by these people?” A no-brainer, I mused. We had a kid. Welcome to the Dollhouse of Catechumens.

It’s no surprise that religion goes after the young. I doubt most people like to think of it in those terms, though. Many tell themselves they are helping instill a system of values at an early age. Others invoke a sense of community. Others believe they are ensuring salvation for their children. Very few seem to consider that the children themselves are not consulted on these matters. Waiting until they are old enough to make informed choices almost guarantees that they will go their own way. And who would want that?

Richard Dawkins, in his book “The God Delusion,” makes the case that religious indoctrination of children is tantamount to child abuse. James Joyce made a similar point in “A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man“: “As the waters of baptism cleanse the soul with the body, so do the fires of punishment torture the spirit with the flesh. Every sense of the flesh is tortured and every faculty of the soul therewith: the eyes with impenetrable utter darkness, the nose with noisome odours, the ears with yells and howls and execrations, the taste with foul matter, leprous corruption, nameless suffocating filth, the touch with redhot goads and spikes, with cruel tongues of flame.”

The passage goes on for a few pages, but the tone is unchanging. Hell is the most horrible place imaginable, and unless you do exactly as we say, you have inherited a one-way ticked called Original Sin. Couple scaremongering with a lust for young boys and institutional cover-up and one wonders why anyone would entrust their children to such self-appointed babysitters.

In answer to the friar’s question: Yes, we have given a great deal of thought as to how we are going to raise Melissa. First up is Bertrand Russell’s oft-cited and immortal assertion, “The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge.” Notice he did not write “guided by faith.” Next we have Robert Ingersoll (the “Great Agnostic” shares a birthday with our baby girl!) who proclaimed, “In the Bible will be found no description of a civilized home. The free mother surrounded by free and loving children, adored by a free man, her husband, was unknown to the inspired writers of the Bible.” He knew; his father had been a preacher.

In short, I think it’s time parents took the ethical education of their children into their own hands. Whatever failures await us, they are sure to be less gruesome than Joyce’s cartoonish description of Hell; and I’m betting the rewards will be far greater than any schmaltzy visions of Kingdom Come.

Published in The American

RT @T1theinfamous A dose of insanity http://bit.ly/9wMcbD

For Stephen, here is Frank Zappa's The Perfect Stranger conducted by Esa-Pekka Salonen, from Finnish television. This piece was commissioned from Zappa by Pierre Boulez.

Some might say that I am a pretentious git for posting this. But those some would be wrong. I am only posting this to see whether the new template I have chosen is wide enough to fit embedded YouTube clips. I really did not want a new template, but I have tired of manually changing the width and height of YouTube clips to fit them into the blog (I am however,grateful to Leigh of the Rushleigh Chronicles for telling me how to make such a change).


Anyway, I like it.

Andy Griffth, aka Mayberry's Sheriff Taylor? Not so beloved back in home-state North Carolina after cutting PSA videos for Obama's health care plan.